Last week was an amazing week for my family. On Wednesday, we found out we get to move into a HOUSE. Like an ACTUAL house. We were fortunate to know some people who were willing to help us get into it, and after what seemed like a thousand houses (an exaggeration for sure, because there probably aren't that many available in all of North Dakota) we walked into this one, and knew that our search was over. It is a older home, but it has been very well cared for. It has 4 bedrooms, 1 3/4 baths and 3200 sq ft. The downfall was that there are 2 bedrooms upstairs, and 2 in the basement. I still have little kids, and I want us all on the same level. So, Woody's and my room will be what is supposed to be the family room. I am thrilled about this, because it is huge, has a fireplace, and a kitchen in it. (In addition to the regular kitchen!) The boys will share room, and Cierra is excited to have her "own private room, FINALLY!" We are so thankful, we know that if we just waited, kept trying and wee faithful, we would get a home. Now we are waiting as patiently as possible to MOVE IN!
We also found out that we are expecting baby #4! I am 5 weeks today, and my progestone levels look good. We don't plan on finding out the gender, and are thrilled for the excitement! We also don't plan on telling our names. There is more to this than what I am saying, but I will talk about it as the pregnancy progresses. We are thrilled, and hoping for a girl. =) YAY!
Monday, October 31, 2011
Saturday, October 22, 2011
Livin' the life!
To start off with, am I the only person in the world who woke up this morning and thought, "HOLY cow! It's October...And October is nearly over."? Seriously. How did that happen. Wasn't this year just beginning? So I realized maybe I should start thinking about Christmas...Maybe... (Hello, my name is Nancy, and I am a procrastinator.) I can not believe that 2011 is nearly over. I am lacking my normal holiday zeal. We usually do some fun, cute decorations for Halloween, but I just can't seem to get into it this year. I am trying to get more in the spirit for Thanksgiving, though. (It is my favorite holiday..)
Ok, enough random babbling (at least about that). Not much has changed here. Still no word on a home. My father-in-law is driving one of our trucks for us and is staying with us..That's right..6 people in a 300 square foot apartment. Thankfully, I really like my father-in-law and he is really only home at night and on Sunday.
I don't know if I mentioned before, but for now Woody isn't going to drive one of our trucks. We have his dad in one, and a temporary driver in the other. We are hoping to get a second driver. We are hauling rock. (Not sure where or why we are hauling rock, but that's what we're doing).
The kids are great. Cierra just had to have 2 teeth pulled, and she still has one more to pull. Then space maintainers. And HOLY COW! is dental work expensive!!! Seriously, 1200 dollars! Thankfully, we have insurance, and only paid about 500 of that. She is doing well in school, and tells me all the time, "Mom, public school just isn't for me." Sweet, I'll take it!
Blayke, oh Blayke. This kid is like the naughtiest, sweetest kid alive. He is wild and crazy! But is also so loving, and quick to give hugs and kisses. He will come up to me when I am sitting on the couch, and say, "Mom, I just wanna hang out with you!" He is also quite funny. He says he is my protector. Yesterday, I was getting after one of our cats, and he yells from his room, "Mom, do I need to come protect you?" It makes me laugh.
Konnor is following closely in his brothers naughty little footsteps. He is obsessed with cat litter and flushing the toilet. I seriously sweep up cat litter at least twice a day. He seems to finally be growing taller. He is smart too. He can point to all of his body parts, tell you what cats and horses say, and knows loads of signs. He isn't talking much yet but I figure he'll do it in his own time. He follows simple directions very well when he wants to. (Throw your diaper away etc..) He is also obsessed with putting clothes on 18 month-old style...both legs in one pant leg, head in the armhole of a shirt..You get the picture..
They are good kids! I am very blessed!
I am not doing much..But I always feel busy...Funny how that works. I am still hitting the gym every morning. Still homeschooling the older 2 kids. Loving my church calling. Pretty much the same as it always is!
Well, there is our update, in all its glory!
Ok, enough random babbling (at least about that). Not much has changed here. Still no word on a home. My father-in-law is driving one of our trucks for us and is staying with us..That's right..6 people in a 300 square foot apartment. Thankfully, I really like my father-in-law and he is really only home at night and on Sunday.
I don't know if I mentioned before, but for now Woody isn't going to drive one of our trucks. We have his dad in one, and a temporary driver in the other. We are hoping to get a second driver. We are hauling rock. (Not sure where or why we are hauling rock, but that's what we're doing).
The kids are great. Cierra just had to have 2 teeth pulled, and she still has one more to pull. Then space maintainers. And HOLY COW! is dental work expensive!!! Seriously, 1200 dollars! Thankfully, we have insurance, and only paid about 500 of that. She is doing well in school, and tells me all the time, "Mom, public school just isn't for me." Sweet, I'll take it!
Blayke, oh Blayke. This kid is like the naughtiest, sweetest kid alive. He is wild and crazy! But is also so loving, and quick to give hugs and kisses. He will come up to me when I am sitting on the couch, and say, "Mom, I just wanna hang out with you!" He is also quite funny. He says he is my protector. Yesterday, I was getting after one of our cats, and he yells from his room, "Mom, do I need to come protect you?" It makes me laugh.
Konnor is following closely in his brothers naughty little footsteps. He is obsessed with cat litter and flushing the toilet. I seriously sweep up cat litter at least twice a day. He seems to finally be growing taller. He is smart too. He can point to all of his body parts, tell you what cats and horses say, and knows loads of signs. He isn't talking much yet but I figure he'll do it in his own time. He follows simple directions very well when he wants to. (Throw your diaper away etc..) He is also obsessed with putting clothes on 18 month-old style...both legs in one pant leg, head in the armhole of a shirt..You get the picture..
They are good kids! I am very blessed!
I am not doing much..But I always feel busy...Funny how that works. I am still hitting the gym every morning. Still homeschooling the older 2 kids. Loving my church calling. Pretty much the same as it always is!
Well, there is our update, in all its glory!
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Did YOU know?
Did you know that today, October 15th is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness day? It kinda gets overshadowed by October's Breast Cancer Awareness Month. (An equally important cause, don't get me wrong.)
So today, I am going to talk about my personal experience with pregnancy loss, which, for some reason, is sometimes a taboo subject. The word "miscarriage" seems to make some people (usually NOT the ones who have had it) uncomfortable.
When my husband and I got married, he wanted 5 kids. I wanted 3. We wanted to have them quickly. I got pregnant with my son, Blayke, right away. (Before this, I also had Cierra and had no problems.) My second pregnancy went smoothly. (including morning sickness, heartburn, swollen feet and all!) I delivered a beautiful, healthy baby boy. Miscarriage, in my mind, wasn't even a possibility. In June, a short 10 months after Blayke's grand entrance, I started feelin' nauseous, and knew almost immediately that I was pregnant. I took a test, and sure enough, got a positive! We were ecstatic. I was slightly nervous. Blayke would barely be a year-and-a-half when the new baby would come. Still, miscarriage wasn't even a glitch on my radar. My first appointment was scheduled for 12 weeks. At 11 weeks, I started bleeding and cramping. I made an appointment immediately, and was in later that afternoon. I got an exam, and the doctor "couldn't tell" (somthing to do with my cervix) if I had, in fact miscarried. I was sure I had as I had NEVER experienced cramps like that before, but the fact that he "couldn't tell" gave me some hope. They drew blood. My HCG levels were definitely that of a pregnant woman. They wanted me back in the next day to see if they rose or dropped. Ok, so here I am, emotional anyway, and not sure if I had lost the baby or not. What a mess!
The next day I went in, and got blood drawn again. Later that day, they called, and told me that I had miscarried, and that I needed to come in and get a shot of Rhogam. I was devastated. I never thought for even ONE SECOND that a miscarriage would happen TO ME. I also have to admit, that before I experienced MY miscarriage, I didn't understand how a woman could be sad about losing something you barely knew was there. I get it now. I cried and cried. We had to tell Cierra what happened, and she was devastated. (I had ruined her fond hope of a sister!) Of course, the doc chalked it up to a "normal" loss, and figured there was no reason for further testing.
Fast forward to October that year...Another round of nausea. And again, just like my 3 previous pregnancies, I knew IMMEDIATELY that I was pregnant. A test a week later confirmed it. Now, having had one miscarriage, I was slightly worried, but somehow reasoned that a second loss was impossible. A week after my test, at work, I started bleeding. I knew instantly what was happening. Woody was driving long haul, so I was left, with 2 older kids, to do it alone. I went home, my mom came and picked up my older 2. I cried the night away in both emotional and physical pain. I went in, again, and they immediately confirmed the miscarriage, and gave me another shot of Rhogam. (I have negative blood, so I get 1 with every pregnancy and sometimes 2). Again, they chalked it up to "normal" pregnancy loss.
A year later I got pregnant. Again, I started having some pains. I was around 6 weeks along, and was sure I was about to miscarry. I called and INSISTED on getting in THAT day and getting tests done. I ended up spending from 9 a.m. until 4 p.m. getting blood drawn, internal exams, ultrasounds and any other kind of test possible done. They also insisted on ANOTHER Rhogam shot, just in case. (If I wasn't losing the baby, I would have to get it anyway) Well, after all this testing, they found out I had low progesterone, which is what, during the first 12 weeks, keeps the baby alive. I also found out I hadn't miscarried, yet. I had to start my medication immediately in order to keep from possibly losing the baby. (Just so you know, I thought the medication was going to be the death of me! It magnified my morning sickness AND fatigue!) But it worked. I was able to carry Konnor to term with NO more problems.
I don't know what happened between Blayke and the first baby. But I am glad I know what to do to help prevent future losses!
The statistics show that anywhere from 10-75% of fertilized eggs will be lost. 22% of pregnancies are lost before they are clinically detected. 10-25% of clinically detected pregnancies will end in miscarriage. I am here to attest, that, as soon as you see that positive, you love that life that is growing inside of you, and to lose it is devastating. Please, take a moment today, and think about babies lost and those parents who are grieving! Thank you!
So today, I am going to talk about my personal experience with pregnancy loss, which, for some reason, is sometimes a taboo subject. The word "miscarriage" seems to make some people (usually NOT the ones who have had it) uncomfortable.
When my husband and I got married, he wanted 5 kids. I wanted 3. We wanted to have them quickly. I got pregnant with my son, Blayke, right away. (Before this, I also had Cierra and had no problems.) My second pregnancy went smoothly. (including morning sickness, heartburn, swollen feet and all!) I delivered a beautiful, healthy baby boy. Miscarriage, in my mind, wasn't even a possibility. In June, a short 10 months after Blayke's grand entrance, I started feelin' nauseous, and knew almost immediately that I was pregnant. I took a test, and sure enough, got a positive! We were ecstatic. I was slightly nervous. Blayke would barely be a year-and-a-half when the new baby would come. Still, miscarriage wasn't even a glitch on my radar. My first appointment was scheduled for 12 weeks. At 11 weeks, I started bleeding and cramping. I made an appointment immediately, and was in later that afternoon. I got an exam, and the doctor "couldn't tell" (somthing to do with my cervix) if I had, in fact miscarried. I was sure I had as I had NEVER experienced cramps like that before, but the fact that he "couldn't tell" gave me some hope. They drew blood. My HCG levels were definitely that of a pregnant woman. They wanted me back in the next day to see if they rose or dropped. Ok, so here I am, emotional anyway, and not sure if I had lost the baby or not. What a mess!
The next day I went in, and got blood drawn again. Later that day, they called, and told me that I had miscarried, and that I needed to come in and get a shot of Rhogam. I was devastated. I never thought for even ONE SECOND that a miscarriage would happen TO ME. I also have to admit, that before I experienced MY miscarriage, I didn't understand how a woman could be sad about losing something you barely knew was there. I get it now. I cried and cried. We had to tell Cierra what happened, and she was devastated. (I had ruined her fond hope of a sister!) Of course, the doc chalked it up to a "normal" loss, and figured there was no reason for further testing.
Fast forward to October that year...Another round of nausea. And again, just like my 3 previous pregnancies, I knew IMMEDIATELY that I was pregnant. A test a week later confirmed it. Now, having had one miscarriage, I was slightly worried, but somehow reasoned that a second loss was impossible. A week after my test, at work, I started bleeding. I knew instantly what was happening. Woody was driving long haul, so I was left, with 2 older kids, to do it alone. I went home, my mom came and picked up my older 2. I cried the night away in both emotional and physical pain. I went in, again, and they immediately confirmed the miscarriage, and gave me another shot of Rhogam. (I have negative blood, so I get 1 with every pregnancy and sometimes 2). Again, they chalked it up to "normal" pregnancy loss.
A year later I got pregnant. Again, I started having some pains. I was around 6 weeks along, and was sure I was about to miscarry. I called and INSISTED on getting in THAT day and getting tests done. I ended up spending from 9 a.m. until 4 p.m. getting blood drawn, internal exams, ultrasounds and any other kind of test possible done. They also insisted on ANOTHER Rhogam shot, just in case. (If I wasn't losing the baby, I would have to get it anyway) Well, after all this testing, they found out I had low progesterone, which is what, during the first 12 weeks, keeps the baby alive. I also found out I hadn't miscarried, yet. I had to start my medication immediately in order to keep from possibly losing the baby. (Just so you know, I thought the medication was going to be the death of me! It magnified my morning sickness AND fatigue!) But it worked. I was able to carry Konnor to term with NO more problems.
I don't know what happened between Blayke and the first baby. But I am glad I know what to do to help prevent future losses!
The statistics show that anywhere from 10-75% of fertilized eggs will be lost. 22% of pregnancies are lost before they are clinically detected. 10-25% of clinically detected pregnancies will end in miscarriage. I am here to attest, that, as soon as you see that positive, you love that life that is growing inside of you, and to lose it is devastating. Please, take a moment today, and think about babies lost and those parents who are grieving! Thank you!
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
We **ARE** alive!
We are here, and alive. Tired, but alive!! Life is so good, and we are being so blessed! The kids are doing well. School is going amazingly well this year. I am so thankful that I am able to homeschool my kids. I am thankful we are able to pray together multiple times a day, that we are able to discuss Scriptures when and how we please. I am so thankful!! They are getting big so fast, and while it makes me sad, I am also proud and excited to see them becoming their own little people!
We have decided to keep Woody out of the truck for the winter. These roads here are SCARY. That is no exaggeration! We have leased our truck onto a company who hauls scorio rock. (the red rock that is all over this place.) It is working out well for us, and we have a few other things in the works, that for now, we will be keeping to ourselves, but they are AMAZING things, and I am excited about them. We have been blessed with the opportunity to employ my Father-in-law, so he will be coming up here to work. We are really excited about that.
The housing situation seems to be looking up. Like, really looking up. But again, we are going to keep all of that under our hats for a bit....We don't wanna be chicken counters!
Our Church callings are going very well. I love teaching the 5 year-olds. They are such sweet spirits! Even the boy who tells me how boring I am, and that I need to bring food! LOL! We love our Ward, and are thankful to be part of it!
Lets see..........What else? We are striving so hard to be very active in our Church, which is not always easy, as most activities are an hour drive each way. But, we are trying, and we know we are being blessed abundantly.
Well, not a lot new going on here. Busy lives, busy kids! So blessed! So very blessed!
We have decided to keep Woody out of the truck for the winter. These roads here are SCARY. That is no exaggeration! We have leased our truck onto a company who hauls scorio rock. (the red rock that is all over this place.) It is working out well for us, and we have a few other things in the works, that for now, we will be keeping to ourselves, but they are AMAZING things, and I am excited about them. We have been blessed with the opportunity to employ my Father-in-law, so he will be coming up here to work. We are really excited about that.
The housing situation seems to be looking up. Like, really looking up. But again, we are going to keep all of that under our hats for a bit....We don't wanna be chicken counters!
Our Church callings are going very well. I love teaching the 5 year-olds. They are such sweet spirits! Even the boy who tells me how boring I am, and that I need to bring food! LOL! We love our Ward, and are thankful to be part of it!
Lets see..........What else? We are striving so hard to be very active in our Church, which is not always easy, as most activities are an hour drive each way. But, we are trying, and we know we are being blessed abundantly.
Well, not a lot new going on here. Busy lives, busy kids! So blessed! So very blessed!
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
SUPER BUSY LIFE!
For those of you who think stay-at-home-moms don't work as hard as you do, I say PHOOEY! I feel like I have been running around like a chicken with my head cut off!!
Recently we celebrated Blaykes birthday. It was an intimate little family celebration. We bought him a bike, helmet set and movie. We had cake and ice cream. We were going to have friends over, but I didn't feel well. It was fun though. I am beginning to realize that "kids need" for lotsa presents stems from us always BUYING lotsa presents...Hmmm...Go figure!
We also celebrated Woodys birthday. That ended up being quite a celebration. That weekend, we went to a ward park clean up and a ward bbq/softball game. Sunday we had friends over for Taco Soup and games. That was a BLAST! On Monday, our friends upstairs had a bbq for Labor Day, and we ended up going to that...Even though I had a TERRIBLE cold. That was fun too. The best part was that Woody had 3 days off! (He normally only gets 1..Sunday...)
Other happenings? We started school. It is going REALLY well. I love it. Cierra is moving right along with second grade work. And we are having a great time doing Story Of The World. We both LOVE IT! If you are homeschooling your child...Well...Shoot....even if you aren't...You should get it, and read it with them. We are studying Ancient Egypt. We have made white crowns and later this week, we will do sugar cube pyramids. How lucky am I?!
Blayke is doing preschool. He knows his alphabet, so we are focusing on the phonics part of it. Hopin' to get him geared up for Kindergarten. I was so frustrated..I scoured the 'net for hours on Saturday, looking for the PERFECT preschool curriculum..(I was going for *free* because I am cheap.) I couldn't find ANYTHING! I was ready to throw in the towel, and BUY a curriculum....And I got a text from a good friend with a link to THIS: http://confessionsofaslackermom.com/ It is an LDS based preschool curriculum.....FREE! WOOHOO! I almost cried with happiness! It was exactly what I was looking for. I supplement it with some things from other sites, but for the most part, it is what we are using.
Konnor is growing so fast. He is 17 months old and recognizes his eyes, ears, nose, mouth, head, belly, fingers and toes. Last night, I told him to go get me the book Goodnight Moon, and he walked over to our bookshelf, and picked it RIGHT OUT!
Maybe I am biased, but I think my kids are GENIUSES!!
In other news, I am babysitting 2 little girls. One only comes on Monday. They are so good. And so fun. The kids like having them here, and so do I. I also got a calling in Church, and apparently Heavenly Father REALLY thinks I need to be with kids. I am going to be a primary teacher of 5 year-olds. I am excited. (I will admit, though, I was really looking forward to Konnor going to nursery next month so that I could enjoy my classes.... But I am a feather duster!)
Woody is VERY close to having his trailer ready, and handed in his 2 weeks yesterday! YAY! We have another potential employment opportunity that could come with housing, but it doesn't open until December, so we are going to get the truck on the road, keep a prayer in our hearts, and when that time comes, make the decision of whether or not to hire someone to drive, so Woody can have an 8-5, Monday thru Friday job, or to keep him in the truck. (Isn't being a growed up soo much fun!?)
We are still in our lil' apartment, but, hey, IT'S HOME! We are so blessed. I am so thankful for our apartment.
Life is good here! Will be back in Idaho in December and am super excited for it!
Recently we celebrated Blaykes birthday. It was an intimate little family celebration. We bought him a bike, helmet set and movie. We had cake and ice cream. We were going to have friends over, but I didn't feel well. It was fun though. I am beginning to realize that "kids need" for lotsa presents stems from us always BUYING lotsa presents...Hmmm...Go figure!
We also celebrated Woodys birthday. That ended up being quite a celebration. That weekend, we went to a ward park clean up and a ward bbq/softball game. Sunday we had friends over for Taco Soup and games. That was a BLAST! On Monday, our friends upstairs had a bbq for Labor Day, and we ended up going to that...Even though I had a TERRIBLE cold. That was fun too. The best part was that Woody had 3 days off! (He normally only gets 1..Sunday...)
Other happenings? We started school. It is going REALLY well. I love it. Cierra is moving right along with second grade work. And we are having a great time doing Story Of The World. We both LOVE IT! If you are homeschooling your child...Well...Shoot....even if you aren't...You should get it, and read it with them. We are studying Ancient Egypt. We have made white crowns and later this week, we will do sugar cube pyramids. How lucky am I?!
Blayke is doing preschool. He knows his alphabet, so we are focusing on the phonics part of it. Hopin' to get him geared up for Kindergarten. I was so frustrated..I scoured the 'net for hours on Saturday, looking for the PERFECT preschool curriculum..(I was going for *free* because I am cheap.) I couldn't find ANYTHING! I was ready to throw in the towel, and BUY a curriculum....And I got a text from a good friend with a link to THIS: http://confessionsofaslackermom.com/ It is an LDS based preschool curriculum.....FREE! WOOHOO! I almost cried with happiness! It was exactly what I was looking for. I supplement it with some things from other sites, but for the most part, it is what we are using.
Konnor is growing so fast. He is 17 months old and recognizes his eyes, ears, nose, mouth, head, belly, fingers and toes. Last night, I told him to go get me the book Goodnight Moon, and he walked over to our bookshelf, and picked it RIGHT OUT!
Maybe I am biased, but I think my kids are GENIUSES!!
In other news, I am babysitting 2 little girls. One only comes on Monday. They are so good. And so fun. The kids like having them here, and so do I. I also got a calling in Church, and apparently Heavenly Father REALLY thinks I need to be with kids. I am going to be a primary teacher of 5 year-olds. I am excited. (I will admit, though, I was really looking forward to Konnor going to nursery next month so that I could enjoy my classes.... But I am a feather duster!)
Woody is VERY close to having his trailer ready, and handed in his 2 weeks yesterday! YAY! We have another potential employment opportunity that could come with housing, but it doesn't open until December, so we are going to get the truck on the road, keep a prayer in our hearts, and when that time comes, make the decision of whether or not to hire someone to drive, so Woody can have an 8-5, Monday thru Friday job, or to keep him in the truck. (Isn't being a growed up soo much fun!?)
We are still in our lil' apartment, but, hey, IT'S HOME! We are so blessed. I am so thankful for our apartment.
Life is good here! Will be back in Idaho in December and am super excited for it!
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Why I'm here..At least...Part of it.
I live in Watford City, North Dakota. Never heard of it? Neither had I until about a year and a half ago. It is an hour from the closest Wal Mart and church. We drive 3 hours to attend the Temple or go to stake conference. I am 800 plus miles from my family.
Naturally, the question has come up, WHY?!
Sure, there is the employment thing...North Dakota has the lowest unemployment rate in the nation.. Plus the jobs here pay DANG good.
I could do what a lot of people are doing, and move back to Idaho and Woody could come home ever 2 or 3 or 4 weeks. NOT an option. We like seeing him every night.
Still, if you have ever experienced a winter here in ND, you will continue to ask WHY?! It is a whole other world here. Sometimes I feel like I have moved to a foreign country..Sometimes a foreign PLANET!
This story does in fact have a point. Woody and I have often felt that the Lord wants us here. We don't know specifics. (Don't know that we ever will).... Well, this last Sunday, during Relief Society, our RS president was giving the lesson and said, "A lot of us are here, without knowing the reason. I believe the reason, at least part of it, is that we weren't being who Heavenly Father needed us to be when we were back where we came from." (Most of us here are in the same sort of situations.) Now, I pondered this...And then I pondered it some more. How true is this statement?! I mean, to stay active here takes work...like...a lotta it. If you wanna participate in most activities, you drive an hour. We woke up at 5:30 am this past Saturday to attend a ward park clean up.
If you were previously just doing just whatcha had to to get by.....If you move to good ol' North Dakota you will go one of 2 ways...You will either find yourself putting a lot of effort.....a lot of sacrifice...into being an active member of the Church...or you will find yourself sliding on the slippery slope of inactivity. There isn't a lot of room for that in-between-do-just-what-you-have-to-do-to-get-by thing here. <I feel like I am now, finally, 10 years after baptism, willing to do the work to becomethe person Heavenly Father needs me to be. It does take a lot of work. It isn't always easy to get up, get ready, drive an hour, go to meetings, drive an hour home. Especially because it is Woodys ONLY full day off in the week.
I know that I am here because it was actually the best way for me to become the woman, wife, mother and Daughter of God that I need to be for the eternities. And, I am THANKFUL for that, and even more thankful that I know it.
Naturally, the question has come up, WHY?!
Sure, there is the employment thing...North Dakota has the lowest unemployment rate in the nation.. Plus the jobs here pay DANG good.
I could do what a lot of people are doing, and move back to Idaho and Woody could come home ever 2 or 3 or 4 weeks. NOT an option. We like seeing him every night.
Still, if you have ever experienced a winter here in ND, you will continue to ask WHY?! It is a whole other world here. Sometimes I feel like I have moved to a foreign country..Sometimes a foreign PLANET!
This story does in fact have a point. Woody and I have often felt that the Lord wants us here. We don't know specifics. (Don't know that we ever will).... Well, this last Sunday, during Relief Society, our RS president was giving the lesson and said, "A lot of us are here, without knowing the reason. I believe the reason, at least part of it, is that we weren't being who Heavenly Father needed us to be when we were back where we came from." (Most of us here are in the same sort of situations.) Now, I pondered this...And then I pondered it some more. How true is this statement?! I mean, to stay active here takes work...like...a lotta it. If you wanna participate in most activities, you drive an hour. We woke up at 5:30 am this past Saturday to attend a ward park clean up.
If you were previously just doing just whatcha had to to get by.....If you move to good ol' North Dakota you will go one of 2 ways...You will either find yourself putting a lot of effort.....a lot of sacrifice...into being an active member of the Church...or you will find yourself sliding on the slippery slope of inactivity. There isn't a lot of room for that in-between-do-just-what-you-have-to-do-to-get-by thing here. <
I know that I am here because it was actually the best way for me to become the woman, wife, mother and Daughter of God that I need to be for the eternities. And, I am THANKFUL for that, and even more thankful that I know it.
Friday, August 19, 2011
POM POMS! (AKA:The POOF experiment) EXPLANATION
Recently, Woody and I made the decision to stop spanking our children. We did not come to this decision lightly, and had been pondering and praying about it for quite some time.
I personally feel that spanking is an extreme punishment meant for extreme behavior. (i.e.: Blayke running into the road after being told to stop when we are on a walk.) We were to the point, though, that they got spankings for everything! I hate that when I would go near my 3 (almost 4...sigh...That is for another post...) year-old he would flinch. Talk about feeling lower than dirt. I want respectful, obedient children. Not fearful children. I truly believe respect manifests the feeling of not wanting to do wrong, even behind a parents back. I feel that fear just makes a child not want to do wrong in your presence. (I don't live under a rock, and don't believe for a second that my children wont do things behind my back.) My hope, however, is for them to respect their parents, themselves and the Lord enough that they don't want to disappoint any of us. (C'mon, I am allowed goals and hopes and such, right.....???)
So, we started brainstorming about how to go about disciplining...Of course, everyone has their own opinions, and this is a HOT topic. I read up on "Love and Logic", which is, in theory, wonderful. But I am too lazy for it. There are so many parenting ideas out there, that if you 'google' it, your head is likely to spin off your neck!!
So, I consulted the One that I knew could ultimately help me, and I prayed. (Probably should have started it this way, but I am a bit slow at times!) While cleaning later that day, I remembered, with His help I am sure, (I was impressed at how quickly I got my answer to this prayer. It is like he was waiting for me to ask..) my friend "A". One time, while at her house, she made her son 'pay' to get on the computer. I figured that he had to earn the craft pom-poms that she had him 'pay' with. I figured I could do that. So, I made a list of ways Cierra could earn the pom-poms. Later that day, I had a chat with "A" about her pom-pom idea, (She says it wasn't hers) and expanded on my list. I proposed the idea to Woody, and he likes. So here is our plan!
For things such as chores, personal hygiene, good behavior, manners, neat schoolwork, reverence during scriptures, prayer and Sacrament etc...the children will earn a specified amount of pom-poms. (Each child will have a list tailored to suit them). They can also lose their pom-poms. Misbehavior in general will result in them having to "pay" me. They will also have to "pay" for TV time. (So far, this is the only thing I abhor that they do. We aren't a video game family, so that is not a problem...yet.) At the end of each week (Saturday) we will take all 4 jars (my two, and each of theirs) and they get a quarter (Cierra) and a dime (Blayke) for every pom pom they have earned, even the ones they used to pay me. Then out of that comes their tithing. Once we figure their tithing, they will pay me for however many pom poms were in my jar. Then they keep what is left.
Our goals with this "POOF experiment" (I call 'em poofs) are: 1. Reward good behavior. 2. Discourage behavior that is less than it should be. 3. Teach the Gospel Principle of tithing through real life experience. 4.Offer the children to earn allowance as opposed to giving them an allowance. (It is my personal opinion that an allowance that isn't earned teaches children very little.) I think it is important that they pay tithing on every cent they earn. Before they pay me. I also feel it is important to hand them every bit of money they earn instead of just what is left in their jars, so that they really understand paying me. I feel paying me in MONEY will be more effective than paying me in poofs. (The poofs will be easier to manage than the coins though on busy days through the week.)
We plan on having an FHE lesson on obedience this Monday to start the 'Experiment'. Saturday will be their "Pay day" so that when we go to Church Sunday, they are ready to pay their tithing. Our next FHE will be on the importance of paying tithing.
I will attempt weekly posts to let everyone know how it is going. I am giving the 'Experiment' 6 weeks. If, at that time, it is failing we will reevaluate!
p.s. I have noticed a huge change in Blayke since we stopped spanking and I have tried harder to praise good behavior. I am sure that part of it is due to the fact that I pray every day for patience, and for them to be obedient. I also believe, though, that he will respond well to a rewards system.
I personally feel that spanking is an extreme punishment meant for extreme behavior. (i.e.: Blayke running into the road after being told to stop when we are on a walk.) We were to the point, though, that they got spankings for everything! I hate that when I would go near my 3 (almost 4...sigh...That is for another post...) year-old he would flinch. Talk about feeling lower than dirt. I want respectful, obedient children. Not fearful children. I truly believe respect manifests the feeling of not wanting to do wrong, even behind a parents back. I feel that fear just makes a child not want to do wrong in your presence. (I don't live under a rock, and don't believe for a second that my children wont do things behind my back.) My hope, however, is for them to respect their parents, themselves and the Lord enough that they don't want to disappoint any of us. (C'mon, I am allowed goals and hopes and such, right.....???)
So, we started brainstorming about how to go about disciplining...Of course, everyone has their own opinions, and this is a HOT topic. I read up on "Love and Logic", which is, in theory, wonderful. But I am too lazy for it. There are so many parenting ideas out there, that if you 'google' it, your head is likely to spin off your neck!!
So, I consulted the One that I knew could ultimately help me, and I prayed. (Probably should have started it this way, but I am a bit slow at times!) While cleaning later that day, I remembered, with His help I am sure, (I was impressed at how quickly I got my answer to this prayer. It is like he was waiting for me to ask..) my friend "A". One time, while at her house, she made her son 'pay' to get on the computer. I figured that he had to earn the craft pom-poms that she had him 'pay' with. I figured I could do that. So, I made a list of ways Cierra could earn the pom-poms. Later that day, I had a chat with "A" about her pom-pom idea, (She says it wasn't hers) and expanded on my list. I proposed the idea to Woody, and he likes. So here is our plan!
The POOF experiment
For things such as chores, personal hygiene, good behavior, manners, neat schoolwork, reverence during scriptures, prayer and Sacrament etc...the children will earn a specified amount of pom-poms. (Each child will have a list tailored to suit them). They can also lose their pom-poms. Misbehavior in general will result in them having to "pay" me. They will also have to "pay" for TV time. (So far, this is the only thing I abhor that they do. We aren't a video game family, so that is not a problem...yet.) At the end of each week (Saturday) we will take all 4 jars (my two, and each of theirs) and they get a quarter (Cierra) and a dime (Blayke) for every pom pom they have earned, even the ones they used to pay me. Then out of that comes their tithing. Once we figure their tithing, they will pay me for however many pom poms were in my jar. Then they keep what is left.
Our goals with this "POOF experiment" (I call 'em poofs) are: 1. Reward good behavior. 2. Discourage behavior that is less than it should be. 3. Teach the Gospel Principle of tithing through real life experience. 4.Offer the children to earn allowance as opposed to giving them an allowance. (It is my personal opinion that an allowance that isn't earned teaches children very little.) I think it is important that they pay tithing on every cent they earn. Before they pay me. I also feel it is important to hand them every bit of money they earn instead of just what is left in their jars, so that they really understand paying me. I feel paying me in MONEY will be more effective than paying me in poofs. (The poofs will be easier to manage than the coins though on busy days through the week.)
We plan on having an FHE lesson on obedience this Monday to start the 'Experiment'. Saturday will be their "Pay day" so that when we go to Church Sunday, they are ready to pay their tithing. Our next FHE will be on the importance of paying tithing.
I will attempt weekly posts to let everyone know how it is going. I am giving the 'Experiment' 6 weeks. If, at that time, it is failing we will reevaluate!
p.s. I have noticed a huge change in Blayke since we stopped spanking and I have tried harder to praise good behavior. I am sure that part of it is due to the fact that I pray every day for patience, and for them to be obedient. I also believe, though, that he will respond well to a rewards system.
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